“I grew up with my father in Kenya till the age of 16 when I decided to come to Uganda to look for my mother. Living with my step mother in Kenya was very hard because I was almost like a house maid—actually I was worse than a house maid because house maids get a salary at the end of the month. I watched my step mother’s kids go to school every day for 16 years, it was so disturbing. My father wasn’t broke he had money. He always took us out as a family to fancy restaurants in Nairobi. He bought us gadgets and nice clothes. But I can never forgive him for not taking me to school, it still hurts me to date. It’s so embarrassing when I can’t even read a simple text or a sign post because I never had a formal education. I finally came back to Uganda and started living with my mother, it’s not what I expected. We were like strangers. This is someone that left me when I was about 2 years and I was seeing them again after 14 years. I’d feel angry whenever I looked at her because to me she was responsible for all my suffering. If she hadn’t left me maybe my life would have turned out differently. I later left her place and moved in with my boyfriend. Unfortunately I got pregnant while at my boyfriend’s place. He denied the baby and sent me away. I tried staying with my friends but nobody wanted me. They’d let me stay for a day or two then ask me to leave. I kept moving from one friend to another. I was now 7 months pregnant. I got so stressed out I resorted to drinking heavily from morning to dusk hoping I’d just pass out & die. I hated the father of my unborn child, he had spoilt my future and he wasn’t offering me support. I got tired of everything so I went back to my mother’s place. One day I got labour pains and my own mother couldn’t even help me. It was my step father that heard me groaning in pain and rushed me to a clinic where I gave birth from. My step father helped me with the hospital bill and we went back home. That night my mother came back drunk and the baby was crying. I tried breast feeding it but in vain. It cried for a full night till morning. My mother got fed up and sent me back to my boyfriend’s place. He had got another girlfriend. I asked him for money to take our baby for checkup but he kept making empty promises and dodging me. He then stopped coming back home. The baby later died in my arms I couldn’t believe it. I walked in the middle of the road holding its body in my arms wishing a car could just run me over and end my suffering. I was determined to die but it didn’t happen. People pulled me away but I wasn’t myself. I hated my baby daddy, I hated my friends, I hated my mother and them I hated myself. I started a new life, left all my old friends. I’m now learning tailoring which will help me earn some money. I’m so sick and tired of men disrespecting me, You know when you’re dependent on your partner for everything they despise and take you for granted—I learnt my lesson. To everyone out there, You can be going through some really tough moments feeling worthless wishing you were dead then you meet someone and your life changes forever. If you’re still breathing never lose hope because life can change in an instant. Personally whenever I see someone with a disability involved in an economic activity other begging. It motivates and challenges me to work even harder.”
(Namungoona, Kampala)
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